There are two types of people in this world, those who can...
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extrapolate from incomplete data...
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Yesterday a clown held a door open for me.
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I thought it was a nice jester.
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5/4 of people admit they're...
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bad at fractions.
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Today I gave my dead batteries away.
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They were free of charge.
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How do you keep an idiot in suspense?
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I'll tell you later...
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"99.9% of the people are dumb!"…
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"Fortunately I belong to the remaining 1%"
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I'm done being a people pleaser...
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if everyone's okay with that.
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What's the name of a man that just got done digging?
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... Doug!
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Three conspiracy theorists walk into a bar...
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You can't tell me that's just a coincidence!
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I called the paranoia hotline this morning.
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They said "How did you get this number?"
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What do you call a large person who never tells the truth in Louisiana?
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A jumbo-liar!
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Why are lawyers buried 12 feet under?
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Because deep down, they're good people!
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What's the name of a very polite, European body of water?
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Merci.
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I know a lot of jokes about retired people,...
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but none of them work.
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Why did two tall people get along so well?
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They could really see eye to eye.
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Why was the gossip disliked at the coffee shop?
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She always spilled the tea.
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If you feel like someone is watching...
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you, you're not alone.
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How was the handsome runner described?
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"Dashing."
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What did the sapphire's best friend tell her?
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"You're a real gem."
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Did you hear about the bossy man at the bar?
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He ordered everyone around.
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How do celebrities stay cool?
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They have many fans.
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Why did the invisible man turn down the job offer?
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He couldn't see himself doing it.
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Knock, knock. Who's there? A little old lady. A little old lady who?
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Hey, you can yodel!
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The waiter asked if I wanted a box for my leftovers, but...
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I told him I'm not into fighting.
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I used to be able to play the piano by ear, but...
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now I have to use my hands.
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How did the phone propose to his girlfriend?
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He gave her a ring.
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Why shouldn't you enter into a contract with Wolverine?
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Because of his retractable clause.
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Someone stole my mood ring.
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I don’t know how I feel about that.
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Did you hear about the man who fell into an upholstery machine?
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He's fully recovered.
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What did the zero say to the eight?
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That belt looks good on you.
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Frequently Asked Questions
How many people dad jokes do you have?
We currently have 35+ people dad jokes in our collection, and we add new ones regularly. Download the app to access the complete library!
Are these people jokes appropriate for kids?
Yes! Our people dad jokes are family-friendly and safe to share with kids of all ages. Dad jokes are all about clean, groan-worthy humor.
Can I share these people dad jokes?
Absolutely! Feel free to share these jokes with friends, family, and on social media. You can also save your favorites in our free app.
Where can I find more dad jokes?
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